I wake up every morning looking forward to the rituals I adore: the making of the perfect cup of coffee, and the running of the perfect warm and bubbly bath.
I open the back door for my two dogs, turn the water on, put some inspiring music on Spotify and greet the new and promising day.
And then I ruin everything.
I pick up the day’s To Do List which I have already written the night before. I rewrite it, negotiating time and action, listing all the appointments and the “necessary” tasks, the ones that were not completed yesterday get an underline and an exclamation point – a punitive reminder to do more and to better today.
Aristotle wrote: "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act, but a habit."
So true.
So how do I wrench the To DO List out of my sweaty palms and find a new path to joy and productivity?
Greg Keller, the author of The ONE Thing writes that limiting your to do list to support the ONE thing you want to accomplish is: “The surprisingly simple truth behind extraordinary results.” He advocates creating habits in your life that support your ONE most important thing. “Goal setting is a spiritual journey”, Keller writes. Like a series of dominos set up to knock each other down, your One action can do all the work, by setting off a chain reaction of productivity. If you line up your daily actions efficiently one domino (if it’s the right one) is all you need on your list.
B.J. Fogg the author of Tiny Habits: The Small Changes that Change Everything says the two practical things we can do every day for sane and happy productivity are to change our environment and take baby steps. So my first new tiny habit to change is letting go of my long, punitive, day wrecking To Do List and start each 24 hours joyfully, gracefully, easily.
So can we find the courage to cut the To Do List in half or in thirds or quarters or throw it out all together?
It is hard to fight the mainstream addiction to DOING, the BUSY obsession. The credo of the western world messaged to us everywhere seems to be: MORE. Be more, make more work harder because the more you do, the longer hours you work, the more friends you have, the more money you make the better you are.
But deep inside that paradigm is the exhausting notion that we are never ENOUGH. I call this voice MRS. MORE. She is mean and relentless and I hardly ever please here no matter how many things I check off my long To Do list.
I actually love lists. I love lists of flowers, lists of cities, lists of things I believe in. I love list poems and list songs and inspiring speeches built from lists. I use lists in my writing all the time. But these are lists that exist without time limits and the pressure of completion by end of day. My To Do list never gives me the pleasure these other lists do.
My One Thing is using creativity, compassion and engaged theatre practice to connect people to themselves and to each other.
I love the art of inspiring people to express themselves freely and to heal. I adore the act of encouraging people to build community and compassion across borders of any kind..
I do my one thing with coaching, mentorship. teaching, writing, performance, leadership, ritual and ceremony. I am a hybrid, a collage, but at the heart of all those methods of expression there is still One Thing. My day needs to be shaped in the service of that one thing.
So here is how I started to change that habit: Now, instead of making a list, I draw a circle. I put the one thing the one main purpose of my day in the center.
The things I do in the service of that are MY choices not direct orders from MRS. MORE.
So my To Do List becomes a spiritual journey and a work of art.
Meditation: What is your one thing? How can you accomplish your goals today spiritually, in the gentle and loving service of your one thing?